The patriotic buzz of #UninstallSnapchat and #BoycottSnapchat and the united efforts of my fellow Indians that lead to many netizens uninstalling Snapdeal app instead, for no fault of its own has lead me to believe that we Indians are so united whether it is for the right reason or for the most lame reason, our patriotism (by patriotism here I mean it virtually, just like any trending twitter topic) towards our country will flourish and break apart even the most powerful force(by force here I mean the “allegedly” word that’s barely visible to our naked eyes). All this unity was so overwhelming to catch up with on an Easter Sunday holiday. Well we Indians do leave a great impact globally. Here’s a TV commercial by #Lufthansa which depicts this kind of global influence.
Anyways getting back to today’s post, I wanted to let you guys know the stereotypes I come across by being an Indian Christian living in India where majority of the country is Hindu.
Indian by birth, yet I am challenged to prove it regularly, sometimes as a part of a joke with my mates or sometimes as a part of a situation where my friend’s mom would ask me if I am taking her for a drinking spree. The second statement will make sense after reading my complete post, but all these funny and serious moments take place regularly because living in Mumbai as a Catholic girl whose hometown is Goa, whose looks are barely Indian (everybody points this out specially the close ones) and whose ancestors were Portuguese calls for “that’s not true at all” in my mind for so many hideous stereotypes I face.Firstly it begins with the religion I follow, I am Roman Catholic and this being a minority religion practiced in India where the population is merely 1.55 % of the total population, it’s funny how some fellow Indians perceive us, it begins with calling us “paowalas” or cracking lame pao jokes, to accusing us of being drunkards, to accusing of us westernizing India(PS:- Pao is a type of Goan bread had for breakfast in most Goan homes). Its really hard explaining to people my true nature especially when you are a non-drinking, vegetarian so called “paowala”,judged based of religious stereotyping. The one reason why I am a vegetarian today after giving up eating animals since 3 years is because I really love animals and eating a dead animal’s carcass does not give me pleasure or peace of mind. Through this post I will just try proving most people’s assumption is not really what it is. Well we Christians(at least my family and me) never do take all this at heart and laugh it off and so should you after reading this post.
Here is a list of ridiculous situations/questions/comments I deal with when people realize my so called “Origins”. *based on true events*
- You never drink? What rubbish, you are a Catholic. You are definitely lying.
- What men!!! O men, bloody, no men, all bloody men,bugger.
- Are you a “pao” addict too? Why are Christians called pao’s ?
- Can you teach us how to jive / disco dancing? Since you are a Catholic you must be a pro at these dance forms.
- Do you party all day? Do you go clubbing? Mostly only Christians party the most…
- Do you speak Hindi? I bet you don’t. Do you speak Hindi in an accent ?
- Do you really ‘eat the body of Christ and drink His blood’?
- “Christian chicks are too easy “
Why not try me if it’s that easy 😛
Really? I don’t think so. What’s easier would be a hard knock on everyone’s head who thinks so.
- Why is Good Friday good? Are y’all happy about killing your own God?
- Do you eat meat all day/everyday? You seriously can’t be a vegetarian …
Of course I eat people too whenever I can. Because who would believe I am a vegetarian and the only non-veg stuff I eat are eggs. Sigh!! But no I really eat people once I am bored of them.
- Will you ever marry? Why do Christians get divorced so easily?
Nah, I’ll rather live with cats and perform black magic on people who marry.But to be honet I don’t really know any couple who have been divorced personally so how does religion determine a bond between two people?
- Do you wear traditional Indian clothes?
- Do you go about converting Hindus all the time?
When I am told that we tend to convert, I am puzzled as there are so many sects and we ourselves have no clue which group is doing it. We do not even know which group to condemn. So not sure about this whole conversion thingy but yes we do love helping people in need.
- You can’t really do yoga because of the Hindu chants ?
- You have never been to a temple right ?
So all in all Indian Christians are just a bunch of peace loving people who are definitely #MoreIndianThanYouThink. Some of us love keeping up with our Indian culture and heritage. We are all not #AgreezKiAulad. We are Indians first. Following a particular way of living is a choice. Some of us drink, some don’t, some like to wear traditional,some like to westernize their outfits etc , the list of choices can go on.
PS: – This post is for fun and entertainment purpose only. I am not trying to hurt anybody’s religious sentiments or beliefs through this post. If I have hurt anyone’s sentiments through this post then please take a look at the picture below of some really cute animals which should make you smile,rather than dragging me to court or getting someone to send me death threats: P Just Kidding. Constructive criticism is always welcomed by me, so do leave in some.